Are you ready to put yourself first in your 55+ years? Your host, Laurie Adams at 60+, successfully did that and is here now to help you discover what you want for your own, full second act in life. She lived in the people-pleasing era where young girls learned to put themselves last and how, as experienced, mature women they can rekindle dreams and realize them. A certified life and weight loss coach, Laurie, along with her variety of guests, share how they have shifted into their best years yet. If you’re stuck on the back burner and ready to fire-up at mid-life and beyond, tune in weekly to hear inspiring conversations and personal journeys with info you can apply to get going. Real self care and moving from hope to success starts here—for a new companion, or career, retirement, mastering weight loss, fitness and more. And if you’d like to work with Laurie 1-on-1, contact her at hello@laurieadamscoaching.com.
37. January 1 Resolutions? Quitters’ Day is Right Behind
•Laurie Adams
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Why, why, oh why do we still cling to the tradition of making New Year’s Resolutions? Because, on January 1st, they promise to be so effective? Nope, nope, nope. They’re so superficial that the second Friday in January is now well known as “Quitters Day,” when nearly 25 percent of resolutions are dropped flat. Listen up to learn why it’s time to drop the resolutions list off of your annual to-do list and discover how true life transformation is actually achieved.
Hi, and welcome to the Fire Up at 55 Plus Podcast, a show about how to put yourself first in your second act of life. I'm Certified Life and Weight Loss Coach Lori Adams, here to empower you to let go of guilt, take charge of your health, then find and fulfill your dreams. It's never too late, so let's get started. Why Y O Y? Do we still cling to the tradition of making New Year's resolutions? Because on January 1st they promised to be so effective? Nope, nope, nope. They're so superficial that the second Friday in January is now well known as Quitter's Day, when nearly 25% of resolutions are dropped flat. Or do we keep at it because the history is so inspiring? No, again. The history is just long and a long way off from what we probably intend when we set them. It all started 4,000 years ago when the ancient Babylonians made promises to the gods to repay debts and return anything they borrowed. Well that's motivating, right? And as resolutions moved through religious traditions through the generations to eventually becoming a largely secular practice, most people set resolutions now about themselves and to pursue self-improvement. Well, if you've been listening to me and this podcast, you know that my credo of words matter spurs me to say off the bat that self-improvement is not necessary. You don't need to be improved. But if you truly want to pursue self-development, self growth, for transformational change, for your best life ever, I'm all in, but not in a resolutions sort of way. Yet, forty five percent of Americans report that they usually set New Year's resolutions, with only eight percent keeping them successfully. So, what is the person to think about when packing up the ornaments or watching the Rose Bowl parade? Not a quick list of resolutions, that's for sure. That's a lot like making a vision board out of pretty pictures that gloss over what you really want, what you've thought about that you want, considerably thought about. It is natural that at year's end we reflect upon our accomplishments and disappointments of the previous twelve months. And the disappointments can serve to trigger dreams of a more fulfilling new year, especially at an emotional time of year. Well, that's the holidays, right? The ups and downs. So if you're thinking about the disappointments a little bit more than you normally might, and you want to make your dreams come true with passion and perseverance, well it can be a lot of fun. But it isn't going to be quick. So enjoy the ride. My real first life coach, author Elizabeth Benton, who leads the program and the podcast, both titled Primal Potential, suggests reframing resolutions as commitments and detaching them from a specific time frame. Instead of associating resolutions only with the new year, Elizabeth encourages setting commitments throughout the entire year. This allows for flexibility and removes the pressure of achieving everything by a particular date. In her book Chasing Cupcakes, probably my favorite about transformation, Elizabeth wrote, resist the temptation to move automatically to the solution you've always tried, especially if that one isn't working. In other words, the temptation of New Year's resolutions. This approach echoes the practice and advice of life coaches and positive psychology practitioners. For true growth and transformation, there is a lot of change in mindset and subsequent actions that has to take place. But that change is doable. As atomic habits author James Clear and so many others advocate, it's done one small step at a time, building one upon the other. It's more doable as you continue because of the sense of accomplishment and real positive changes you have in your life. It's not a bright and shiny New Year's resolution to get it all done right away at the beginning of 2024. You know that's not realistic. And all these experts that I've talked about and that I'll continue to talk about know that it is more doable a little bit at a time. By next year you'll be, wow, I've really made some changes. And you've got all of 2024 and beyond to do that, to create with fun and live into the new identity, the unique identity you want for yourself. There'll be some discomfort that comes with the territory, but you're gonna feel so great when you plunge through that and make yourself happier overall. And because a fitness and health overhaul ranks at 65 to 80% of all New Year's resolutions, I'm gonna share that renowned longtime fitness trainer Kathy Smith urges especially midlife women to set realistic and attainable goals when it comes to fitness resolutions. Rather than aiming for dramatic transformations, as we might have when we were in our maybe twenties, focus instead on making small, sustainable changes over time that align with your lifestyle, capabilities, and the goals that you want to achieve. This approach, as James Clear says, allows for steady progress and long-term success. She's got very specific advice you can find on her website and elsewhere. But I'll also share an important aside that she gives to midlife women. Prioritize strength training, Smith urges, as we age, maintaining muscle mass becomes critical. To keep this holiday time message short and sweet, I'll add just one success tip for turning a considered resolution into a real achievable goal. That is find your peeps, your people. Known as the mirroring effect, it's the practice of surrounding yourself with people who are like minded about your aspirations. Positive psychology has revealed surrounding yourself with the people that you'd like to be like it creates a sense of community, support that is really going to support your efforts. Eager to become a writer? Join a writer's group or take a class. A reader? Join a neighborhood or local library book club. A runner? Find couch to 5K groups through a nearby running store, or even an online group that gets together via Zoom to talk about their successes and failures. Or a Facebook group. Anything like that. If this time next year, you want to be the repeat champion of Netflix binging, well, stick with the other couch potatoes. And of course you know I love a quote. So here's an ironic one on the topic from writer, actress, and producer Mindy Kayling. Quote, My resolution this year is to procrastinate less. Hold on. Let me write that down and get back to you later. For results-oriented coaching with me one-on-one, for goal, pursuit that works, or to focus on weight loss results at Midlife Plus, please just send an email to me at hello at laurieadamscoaching.com so we can schedule an easy conversation about what you really want. And to keep the transformational information coming each week, please follow FireUp at 55 Plus wherever you download your podcasts. And if on Apple, share a review and a starworthy rating. It's much appreciated. Happy New Year. Hey, thanks for listening. To contact me directly, please reach out via email to hello at laurieadamscoaching.com. And I invite you to take a look at my flaming hot webpage, fireup at fiftyfiveplus.com. That's FireUp, the word at 55plus.com. And until next week, make the most of your sizzling second act.
